I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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