We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize