is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Randomize
