Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
