is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
