next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
