I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
