i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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