I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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