I molested 6 butterflies tonight
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
