I seem to have left my pride at pride
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize