if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
