and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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