4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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