it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
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