We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
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