I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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