he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Randomize
