would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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