I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
