Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
