Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize