you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Randomize
