yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
