Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
