wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Just took my morning after pill in the library
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Randomize
