we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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