You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
