It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm sobbing to NWA
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
