If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
