Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
