Who wears a wallet chain?!
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
