God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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