On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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