Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
You pole danced in your parka.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize
