He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize