this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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