I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
