im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Who did Billy Mays play for?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize
