Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i was born a porn star she said
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
