I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
