The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
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