Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
