What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Randomize