I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Is Oprah even human
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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