She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
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