Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
