sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
