He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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