I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
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