I just threw up on my dentist
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
