his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
